Who moved the OFF button and where'd you put it?

/*brief preface...
I have ADD really, really bad. Some days I can't even keep track my own
thoughts, so when something comes to mind I have to be able to use it quickly
before that train leaves the station.*/

How do I achieve automatic:NOTHING. Office's automated functions get worse
with every iteration - to me anyway.

How do I get a virtual typewriter??? All I want is to set the margins and
start typing -- that's it, will Office kindly STFU and stop asking me
questions or worse yet just start changing things...no vasoline, no kiss -
its just plain rude. The only auto tip that's I want is the "don't forget to
save"

I probably sound like a jackhole right now because I'm still steaming,
screaming mad about this autofix crap-a## feature - it just killed my
document which was actually almost good and almost done and now...nothing,
its gone - train left the station, and my trains rarely make return visits.

to summarize my rant: all I want are the rulers to set my margins and start
typing, just like a typewriter. Oh, and I want the "save this now," that is
the only auto guesstimation allowed.

If I can just type and get the words out before they vanish I can go into a
new document and format it and apply styles the way I want and then cut and
paste the text where it fits.

OK, yeah I have mental problems, but am I the only person this sounds good to?
Can we please get an OFF button for office -- Oh, and in plain view as well
- which will send that little paperclip cartoon into the corner for a
timeout. Yeah I know he actually left years ago, but anytime I think of an MS
help section that the image I get....